Why I Chose to Stay in the Philippines
At one point in my life, I was given the option to actually live abroad. My aunt, who resided in New York, offered to take me in. She’d put me in a good school and help me settle down there. There were a lot of advantages in agreeing to her offer. A move to the U.S. – especially back then – would have meant the promise of a better life. It would’ve given me the chance to grow up in a “first world” environment with the potential of earning a lot once I started working. While the allure of a good life (and for the kid in me at that time – easy access to all the good comic books) tempted me to jump ship, there were a number of factors that, ultimately, made me decide to just stay in the Philippines.
Family was the first one. I’m an only child and the thought of leaving my parents on their own weighed on me. Questions like “who would watch over them once they got old” or “what if one of them got sick and I’m not around to help” came flooding in. Sure, they still had other relatives they could turn to, but these people also had their own lives, problems, and families to focus on as well. My decision to leave would’ve been easier if I had a brother or sister that I could trust to watch over my parents.
The second reason why I chose to stay was that countries tend to have a lot of requirements for those who want to stay and establish their lives there. I mean, getting a visa just to visit as a tourist is already tough enough. Imagine if you were working on migrating there. You’ll be asked to go to that country’s embassy for interviews, more often than not on weekdays, which would’ve made it difficult especially if you were working or in school. Should you be able to complete all the necessary papers and attend all the required interviews, there’s still the possibility of you being denied entry. I just didn’t like the idea of going through all that effort.
Third, I was lucky enough to have met someone. It may sound cheesy but when you find someone you want to grow old with, it makes leaving for another country tough. After all, long-distance relationships often never work out, and the last thing I wanted to do was risk losing her because we couldn’t make it work. Plus, she also shared the same apprehensions I had of leaving our parents behind, which made it easier for me to reconsider the move abroad.
Fourth, I knew that I would be dealing with a ton of racism. No matter where you go, the moment you enter another country, you’ll be judged not just by what you do but also by what you are, or put simply – the color of your skin. Even though many first world countries have gone far in curbing racism, I felt that once I lived in another country, I would end up fighting for my rights almost every time. If that was the case, I would rather stay in a place that would accept me for what I am and to just deal with whatever hardships may come my way. At least, I’d be in my own country with a good support system close by consisting of family and friends.
Speaking of country, the last reason why I chose to stay was potential – the potential that our country would one day develop into a place that would allow people to live a good life. While some might consider it to be way too idealistic, there were already signs of progress even back then. Remember when we were touted as having a “tiger economy” back in the 1990s? Yes, we did get hit by the global recession and got branded as the “sick man of Asia” but we were able to rebound from it. Multinational companies have opened up shop, bringing in more work and revenue. It was that potential to become one of the better countries in Asia that convinced me to stay.
People have this impression that living abroad means “living the good life.” Anyone who made it overseas was considered a “success story.” But looking back now, and writing this in 2018, I’m glad I made the choice to stay. Sure, the life I have right now is not without hardships, but the tradeoff for staying – the family we’ve grown, a stable income, a humble home we call our own, and more importantly, the peace-of-mind knowing my parents can reach me anytime – make me believe that staying in the Philippines was the right choice.
This post was submitted by Dabs, an avid reader of Flying Ketchup.
